Guys Hitting on Girls

Every once in a while I witness a guy trying to make his way into a woman's life via the "come on". Now I've never been good at this, I had a major dry spell from about age 19-22, and it wasn't until about 23 that I started coming into my own and having some measure of success attracting women. As I've gotten older, my stock is going up and it has become easier. However, never in all this time did I legitimately attempt to "pick up chicks".

My mentality was that I never knew what to say because I convinced myself that there WAS nothing to say; and let's face it, with a cold pick-up, there usually isn't. And thus I remain fascinated by guys who try this. For some time I was envious of dudes who could do it well, until I became mature and discerning enough to know that this type of guy is usually all shell and no substance; once he's conquered what he set out to conquer (you know...), there's not much left to envy about him.

But equally as fascinating and more humorous are the guys who try this before they have come in to their own (which takes a long time for most men). That is, those guys that are trying too hard because they haven't quite blossomed into an interesting person just yet. Case in point, my gorgeous girlfriend (who often is the victim of these incidents, not because she asks for it, she's just really attractive......it happens to all of us...I mean, them) was just recently hit on 3 times in one night on a single subway ride home.

I wasn't with her, but apparently there was a kid who couldn't have been more than 20 yrs old according to her, that asked her for directions, then parted ways, only to track her down on the subway and proceed to ask for her name and where she lived etc. Mind you there was very little conversation before these facts were solicited, so right away he's obliviously crossing the line asking for her name and location right out of the gate (like she's a cadet or some shit?)......this is a sure fire way to get a woman to leave the subway just to get away from your shady persona. You simply don't pull out "where do you live" when on the subway.

Sensing what's happening here, my girlfriend naturally plays the "I have a boyfriend" card. Did I mention she's 26 and this kid's in college still? Anyway, this was not enough for his naive ass to get the picture, so he asks how long she's had a boyfriend. Here is where my girlfriend should have got a little tougher and just told him "none of your business, fuck off little boy"; but she's too sweet for that so she obliged and then check this out......he asks if she's ready to have my children!! At this point my girlfriend should have slapped the shit out of him, but again, she's a doll. According to his theory, if after 11 months of courtship, you're not ready to have your boyfriend's children, then apparently he's not "the one". My girlfriend then got off the train at her stop wishing this wouldn't have happened; and feeling a little bit down on herself for not asserting her privacy and boundaries more sternly with this douche bag.

She told me this story and I couldn't help but shake my head in amusement at the level of stupidity most men (especially young men) have when approaching women. I might have been a late bloomer but at least my dating resume doesn't say DICKHEAD at the top of it. My heart goes out to you ladies, we're a shallow shallow breed sometimes.